Please be advised that every last one of you sounds like an utter moron whenever you say “Stanley Cups”, as if there are more than one. Contrary to what was reported on ESPN this morning, Mark Messier did not “win five Stanley Cups”. He won THE Stanley Cup FIVE TIMES!
Every time one of you dipsticks refers to the Stanley Cup in the plural, a cruise ship mows down a manatee.
Thank you for your attention to this matter.
(Photo courtesy of, and featuring, my Pittsburgh friend PVezz with her man and the Cup on the ice at [soon-to-be demolished] Mellon Arena some time after the Penguins’ win of the Cup last year.)
